EFT at A&E (ER)

Yesterday I had planned a lovely day out with my mum which started with being treated to a yummy breakfast at Dolly’s at Selfridges in London. From there we were due to catch a bus to the Imperial War Museum when we saw our bus and started running for it. My mum, looking up at the bus, missed the stone bench in front of her and tripped over it, banging her head against the corner of the bench in between her eye and temple. Although she felt OK but shaken, there was a lot of blood and I’m pleased to say people around us were very kind and helpful.

After wondering what to do, a Selfridges security guard asked us if we wanted to go to their first aid room which we did. A very sweet first aider gave us plasters and tissues for the blood but recommended we went to A&E and booked and paid for a taxi to take us to University College Hospital.

Accident and Emergency Sign

Public sign on the pavement outside University College Hospital, London showing the direction of Accident and Emergency and other facilities.

Although, as expected, there was a long wait, all the staff were very helpful and kind and we felt in capable hands. As we were very close to Ainsworth Homeopathic Pharmacy, I popped in to get some remedies for injury and shock. As I was walking there, I had some time to reflect on what had happened. Until that point I was in survival mode only thinking of what needed to be done next. The walk to the pharmacy gave me time to reflect and immediately a wave of emotions came over me as well as flashback images on seeing my mother fall.

Immediately I did EFT to give the emotions and images in my mind to acknowledge them and release them leaving me feeling calmer and lighter

When I got back to the hospital, my mother was already being seen by the doctor who was about to start stitching up the wound. I asked if it would be OK to tap on her fingers tapping points as the he was working and he said that he was very open minded and anything that helps his patients relax is good for him too. The tapping helped  my mother feel calm and relaxed during the procedure especially when the doctor said that it was bleeding more than expected so called in a consultant to discuss the best approach.

The only time I forgot to tap was when I felt a bit faint at all the blood!

So all was well in the end and I am pleased to say my mother is recovering well.

The point of me sharing this story is that EFT is my habit and goto place in times of stress. If I didn’t practice regularly and have made it my habit, I would not have had the presence of mind to use it in times of stress and shock.

Here are other times I use EFT as my goto place:

  • whenever negative emotions such as sadness or anger arise for me, I start pressing my finger points and doing touch and breath which is discreet in public places
  • when my daughter has aches or pains
  • when I got stuck at the top of a mountain and couldn’t get down when skiing!
  • when feeling nervous while getting ready to perform on stage when I was in a show a few years ago
  • when I twisted my ankle

I want EFT to be your goto place in times of stress as well (if you don’t already have a technique or system in place that works for you). If you would like to know more about how to create an EFT habit so that you can access it in times of stress, then download a free stress relief tapping video


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Release overwhelm – create pauses from busyness

Activity followed by activity without pausing is like breathing in after breathing in without breathing out inbetween (1)If you breath in,
followed by another breath in,
and keep breathing in,
without breathing out in between,
your body will force you to!

Being busy
without stopping in between,
is like breathing in,
without breathing out in between.
If you don’t create a pause,
your body will force you to.

For everyone that will look different and might be:

  • a cold,
  • a headache,
  • period pain (women!),
  • outbursts of anger,
  • exhaustion
  • weepiness
  • etc

All these are symptoms of overwhelm.

Yesterday I spoke to Sam Rich, EFT practitioner who trained with Peter Donn and I at The EFT Training Centre. She is also a mum of 4 and shares her experiences of tapping with children.

You can see our conversation here and towards the end we do some tapping on overwhelm and then calm and ease.

Sam shared the video with  a few friends who watched it.  Here are their comments:

“Wow you can change lives. I am going to do this again when I get home from work”,  Jackie from Borehamwood

“We all need to do this fantastic”, Amanda from Borehamwood

“OMG I went to bed because of a headache. I followed you both tapping and I don’t need to take a paracetamol ! My headache has gone”, Deborah from St Albans

“Fantastic  I feel really relaxed”, Suzy from Bushey

“I feel very chilled”, annon

“That made me feel nice and sleepy”, Judith from Edgware.

If you are experiencing symptoms of overwhelm and would like to release them, download a free tapping video (under 5 minutes) here.
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Mums – Put Your Own Oxygen Mask on First

Oxygen maskNowadays more and more people are suffering from stress and overwhelm. And they may not even realize it!  So many of the common symptoms include conditions that are common for many. It may start with

too much to do

     leading to…

so many constant thoughts

     leading to…

difficulty sleeping because the mind doesn’t stop

     leading to…

feeling exhausted

leading to…

sugar cravings to keep going

leading to…

mood swings

leading to…

impatience, irritability and taking it out on other people…

Like your loved ones, your friends and your clients!

In my experience of talking to and working with working mums (as well as being one myself!) overwhelm seems to have become an acceptable and normal mode of living (at least for mums if not everyone).

At the school gates mums gather with tales from the battlefield of motherhood such as just avoiding a car accident on the way to school because the kids were shouting in the back or pulling out of the front drive realizing that one of the children was still in the house.

Is this what we want for our future generation?

As mums we try to give them the best chance in life and yet all most of them want is for their mum to simply BE with them. As in:

not on their phone…

not at work…

and not thinking about their To Do list

But in order to be really present with our children (and other people in our lives)  we need to be really present with ourselves! And given the fast pace of life for most people,

we need to take time our for ourselves!

So that when we are with our children or loved ones or friends or clients we can be really present with them.

Why is it that on a plane we are told to put our own oxygen masks on first before helping our?

Our family, friends and clients deserve the best from us and in order for us to do our best we need to put our own metaphorical oxygen mask on first.

What does your oxygen mask look like?

For some it might be:

  • a walk in the woods
  • a long hot bath
  • sitting in a cafe reading a book
  • hanging with friends
  • going for a run
  • doing some EFT
  • going on a retreat

Here is an excerpt from an blab online broadcast I did recently with EFT tapping to release overwhelm.

We need to recharge for a few minutes every day.  If you are feeling stressed or overwhelmed and not sure how to start, download a free video (under 5 minutes) to start releasing some of those negative feelings right now.

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I’m Walking My Talk – just about…

Take time out from your busy lives! That’s my motto. I blog about it. I tweet about it. I work with women who can’t. I tap on it!

Today I got my period and am noticing my need to slow down and nurture myself. I had a lovely  day planned with friends making vision boards. And I was really looking forward to it, although I didn’t fancy driving or interacting with the outside world (other than my lovely friends).

The problem is that I am the kind of person that if I make a commitment, I stick to it, even at the cost to my body if it is hurting or tired. So it was with some discomfort that I messaged the lovely Kate Codrington (abdominal massage and period expert!)  who was hosting it to give her a heads up that I might not be coming as I had my period and wanted to see how I felt. She replied with the most lovely message saying “Stay at home! Rest in your cave” and as I read this I noticed my whole body sigh with relief and start to relax.

She had given me permission to stop!

But did I need her permission?

My favourite question to ask myself when trying to decide what to do is:

“If I truly loved myself what would I do?”

What would you do if you really loved yourself-I knew the answer was to stay at home and nurture myself but all my old programming was still flagging up all the reasons why I shouldn’t.

Here are some reasons why we don’t always listen to ourselves even when we know what is best for us:

  • I need to keep my word
  • I don’t want to miss out
  • I don’t want to let people down
  • I don’t want people to think I’d unreliable
  • I don’t want people to think I’m weak
  • I don’t deserve it

Maybe you can relate to some of these?

20160115_160844Anyway the great news is that I stayed at home and as yesterday I had my Red Tent set up from a retreat I ran this week, I bathed in a red cocoon of love and nurtured myself with my favourite music by Deva Premal, a raw cacao smoothie (raw cacao, chia seeds, flax seeds, dates, lacuma, brazil nuts and coconut water) and made my 2016 vision board while being inspired by Amber Kuileimailani Bonnici on her Woman Unleashed Retreat video :)

So, with a little help from Kate, I walked my talk – thank you, Kate:)

If you are constantly on the go, know you need to stop and feeling overwhelmed and stressed, I have a limited number of FREE “Give Me My Sanity Back” sessions to give away. To apply, email me with what is stopping you from feeling a light and peaceful in this moment.

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Scrooge and Family Dramas

Last weekend I went to see Scrooge the Musical with the lovely Rickmansworth Players.  For those you who aren’t familiar with the story, Scrooge, is a miserly and mean old man and as the story unfolds, it reveals that he had a challenging childhood of poverty and abandonment.

Scrooge Ricky Players

Image by Martin Smith of Origin8 Photography

It appears that he may have created beliefs such as:

  • If I’m rich all will be well
  • People I care for leave so don’t get attached to anyone

His fiancée was waiting for him to be ready to get married but he kept putting it off with the excuse that they don’t have enough money yet. When she gave him an ultimatum, it is not surprising that, given his  beliefs about money and love, he chose money.

We create beliefs about ourselves and about life in childhood.  Typical beliefs might include:

  • I’m invisible (for example if parents always give attention to a sibling)
  • I’m not good enough (for example if parents never seem pleased with child’s grades)
  • I need to take care of myself as nobody will do it for me (for example after a divorce, a mother has to work long hours and is not available)

We are often not aware of the  beliefs we subconsciously create as children but act as if they are the truth and play out in adult life. So for example, someone who created the belief that they aren’t good enough as a child may not go for a job that they are well qualified for as an adult.

Often we overcome these beliefs by rationalising or overcompensating so for example someone who feels invisible might force themselves to be in the public eye in order to feel seen and try to compensate for feeling invisible.

But when one gets together with family gatherings at Christmas or birthdays, the old childhood patterns can start replaying. For example someone who is successful in adult life might feel small and weak in the family circle. Other feelings might be triggered with negative emotions such as anger, resentment, guilt, shame or fear.

Nowadays families are often dispersed and only come together on festive occasions which can intensify these old patterns making people feel uncomfortable in that environment.

If that is something that feels familiar to you and you’d like to feel happier and more peaceful about being around your family, here are some resources that could help you:

  • Download a free exercise to help you get clarity on your patterns in relationship to your family and start to release them
  • Read about how EFT and Family Constellations can support you in having a better relationship with your family
  • Download a Free EFT manual to start tapping away old patterns and creating new happier feelings
  • Contact me on info@eftforwomen.co.uk to book a FREE Good Family Feeling Discovery Session and receive a free plan to start creating freedom within your family.
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Are you being pulled too many directions?

What I have noticed with lots of clients at the moment, is that they feel they are being pulled and stretched in too many directions. And this takes them away from feeling calm and centred.

I would like to share with you a simple process to help you feel calmer and most peaceful with your life as it is right now.

Make a list of things that take you away from being present. Include thoughts, feelings and actual things such as work, taking care of the kids, house chores etc

Here are some of the most common thoughts and feelings clients share that  bother them most:From Chaos to Calm wordcloud

Once you have your list, make a picture of images or words of the things that take up their time and space in your head.

At a recent workshops, we did this process and here are some of the pictures participants drew:


Once you have completed your picture, look at it and choose an emotion that matches how you feel about it from the Emotional Scale below.

1. Joy/Appreciation/Empowered/Freedom/Love
2. Passion
3. Enthusiasm/Eagerness/Happiness
4. Positive Expectation/Belief
5. Optimism
6. Hopefulness
7. Contentment
8. Boredom
9. Pessimism
10. Frustration/Irritation/Impatience
11. Overwhelm
12. Disappointment
13. Doubt
14. Worry
15. Blame
16. Discouragement
17. Anger
18. Revenge
19. Hatred/Rage
20. Jealousy
21. Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness
22. Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/Powerlessness

Once you have identified the emotion, do some EFT/ Tapping on this emotion and then check in with how you feel about the picture again. In the workshop, we did this a few times and all the participants observed their feelings getting  lighter and more positive. Repeat this until you are feel Joy/Appreciation/Empowered/Freedom/Love:) If you have never tapped before, download a FREE EFT manual here.

In the workshop, we then did another process using a combination of EFT and Family Constellations processes to deepen their experience. If you would like to know more about these workshops (Retreats for Women) go here. Or if you live far away, we can achieve the same with 1-2-1 programmes – to book a consultation to find out more about Fast Track to Freedom programmes. To see how I work with skype (working with a client with inappropriate anger towards her son), go here.

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Lunchtime Tapping with Tamara on periscope

I have just discovered Periscope:) Have you tried it? If you don’t know what it is, its an app that you can download onto your phone and watch live broadcasts worldwide.

I have decided to make use of this technology and offer a free tap-along on Monday lunchtimes at 1:00pm UK time. The broadcasts will be available for 24 hours so if you can’t make it, you can always watch later.

So if you have any special requests on themes to tap on, please let me know…

Here is my first Lunchtime Tapping with Tamara:

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